Like last nite. We went straight from work to Arab, secure in the knowledge that the kids would have been bathed, fed, clothed, and doing their mengaji. Aminah had sorted the dinner etc and by the time we went home they were all pretending to sleep. Pretending because they would wait until we are well in the house then they'd all yell "SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Felt bad that the kids did not get our attention, but the kids had a way to make us "pay back" our time lost with them.
( MY ANAK DARA.)
True enough upon our return they surrounded us with the tales of all that they have done- macam sitting in court pulak...
Nadine told me Johan did not want to mengaji and threw a tantrum. Johan does that- he throws a royal tantrum, he'd be breakdancing on the floor, kicking the wall, making angry noises, kicking the maid!!!...Ihave lectured him to say that I do not like him doing that and he should stop that RIGHT NOW YOUNG MAN!!!!!!!. He knows its wrong and apparently after each tantrum he'd say sorry to the maid .
(The reason why our harta will not be distributed to our siblings and just to our kids)
But he's five after all..he's got to let it out somehow. Any ideas on how? Ditto on mengaji- I reminded Nadine that she only started at 5 and was not too keen in the beginning.
Been doing the reading up on rearing young children- boy if I could only do it again!
I'd read more, be more tactile- but I think I'm quite a huggyfeely mom allready- every nite the kids would sleep hugging me (and mom has to juggle taking care of kids or dad) . Now Nadine is taking over as the big sister-boss. She would be the one reminding everyone that they have not had their breakfast etc and then I'd be telling her that it's ok, Daya can have her milo in the car- or it's ok, Sara can stay home today because she said her leg hurt.LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD- dont let that angelic smile fool ya- when she is good she is lovely when she is bad...she is HORRID!
Each of them has a different personality lar...Sara is the sensitive one. Perasa. Easily hurt. Nadine - proud, ego, eager to please. Sophia- sweet- but firm and great PR Skills . Daya- ditto and assertive to boot. Johan- a boy's boy.
Sara got the brunt of my tiredness last nite when she sat sniffing and later silently crying over her foot which had been bitten by an insect. Our house seriously need the Ant exterminator, and she said it was very painful . Johan came by and accidentally brushed against her and she wailed louder, and I raised my voice to her. Lagi lah meraung kan.
Does it really warrant a drama scene??? Kenapa nak cemekkk je ni...I said, I know it hurts but I wish she would not be so lembik or soft- and that I would love her even if she is not hurt or angry or crying- and that she can have my attention by telling me stories etc and not stories of what her sisters did. I guess I was irritated because she had been rather sad -whiny etc since the weekend. (I know, I have probably broken a thousand child rearing rules)
The nite before there was a mini hearing before me the Mummyjudge as a sobbing Sara told me how her other 2 sisters had hurt her feelings, because, (sob sob), she had done something nice for Sophia and (sob sob) when she asked Sophia (sob sob) to get her a glass of water, Sophia refused ("but I was eating!!! " said an equally sobbing Sophia) - anyway Sophia memang ada malash sikit. To make matters worse, KetuaDarjah Nadine heard the pallava and told Sara off for being angry with Sophia. Sigh...semua ini mengecilkan hati Sara..she even said she felt that everyone was against her and that she wanted to RUN AWAY!!!!!
Imagine the scene around the dining table- 2 girls sobbing, of the type with heaving shoulders, and one daughter defiant (that would be the eldest) that she had not done anything wrong.
I made Sara write whatever grievance she had down, and told her to write everything she feels in the same book everyday, so that I can look at it. And I told her she has to TELL the others how she feels, rather than keep it in, and then , cry. Nadine said she did not know that Sara had asked for a glass of water from Sophia- I told Nadine not to be so bossy. To Sophia I told her to help her sister more....
Sigh...Fhening...having girls - and they are not even in their teens yet!!!!!!
But don't get me wrong- most times they are happy kids..they don't notice their parents sometimes, they are so engrossed in their own games. Nadine is a good leader and would get her sisters and brother involved in cluedo or playacting and everyone is sporting enough to join...
Most times its laughter but when the tears come- phew! I need all the negotiating skills man.....
Daddy would just YELL at them...worse!
Let's hope we can ride their adolescent years without any hitches.