I would not have chosen to take a maid, if it was not for my mom. We had returned from years in the UK and 3 kids, and were quite used to having just us for company and each other to rely on. However, in KL, you have that many more visitors and especially if both are working, a maid becomes necessary. Still I was willing to consider other options like daycare etc - I did NOT want a strange woman in my house. Mom, coming across me mopping the floor at 1 am, (she came to tell me my grandmom was not well- that's another story) put her foot down. So we got a maid.
Her name was Siti. She was a hairdresser before and the first thing she said when she arrived was that she had 3 relatives in JB and Penang and can they come over when they are in KL? And by the way she needed RM500 to pay back her hutang back home.
I had no idea what to do or how to act. I said no to the RM500 (only because we didn't know her well enough!), and yes to the visits from relatives. Again, a horrorstricken mom, had to intervene. It was my mom who said to me that maids do NOT sit in front and chat with your guests along wiht you, and maids do NOT wash her clothes along with ours. I dont know, I felt that's like saying, I'm better than you.
Well..the maid left. Citing that she missed her kids and that she wanted to see them as they were ill. I think she just got bored. She thought KL was full of lights and that she would be going out etc . She took a lot of my curry powder etc etc.
Then, Mak B brought along an illegal maid. I was at first apprehensive - alamak, illegal lah! Oklah, kejap je...
But, 7 years later and 1 more kid, Aminah is still with us. I think its a balance between treating them like a person and also having boundaries- of course not everyone will agree with the "Do not talk to my husband!" policy that I adopt and strictly follow (that's also another story).
Now, she wants to go home. I told her, if you want to go home, must tell me in advance. So she told me, 6 months ago. Sigh..mom kept asking me to "pujuk" her. I did, I even offered her better pay. But she wants to go off, she wants to go off. I think if someone wants to go, let them. No point hanging on.
Anyway now I am stuck- so many choices- I have seen quite a few biodatas but then I can't make up my mind. Should we take a married maid or a widowed maid? If married, would they miss their family? I would. If not married, are they going to have boyfriends over here (and interfere with their work?) ..Should I take the younger ones or the older ones? What is the right age? I wanted around 30s so that they are not that inexperienced - then they give me the biodatas of the married ones with kids- if I were the maids I would miss my kids definitely. But then they need the money.
What if she has worked before- is this a good thing? Or if she has relatives- I don't want her to depend on me for her happiness - ie if I don't take her out she does not go out- boring lah . On the other hand, if she does have relatives and friends would she bring them over? Would she be "wild"? Actually I prefer those who have relatives here and I can send them away once a month like we do with Aminah. At least she would not feel lonely etc etc. I think lah.
Did you know that nowadays the salary is RM550?? Agensi Srimanisa said so. But does this mean better service?
Sigh ...how to decide.
BY THE WAY CONGRATULATIONS HAQ and YANI ON THE BIRTH OF SITI HAJAR!!!
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