Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The earful

I just got an earful from my dad just now.

the gist of his long and heated lecture was that he and my mom feel hurt and neglected as we have not been to see them. We did not ask them how their renovation works are going at the house etc. We are too taksub or obsessed with our lives. We don't ask them about theirs.

Sigh..I told my dad whatever he said, is true. I'm sorry that he felt that way, I suppose we are so so busy during the week and during the weekend. Actually I talk to them every 2 days and we spent a whole weekend together at the kampung the Sunday before last. last Sunday was Cameron Highlands.

But at the same time a part of me is smarting at the unfairness of it all. Could he not put himself in our shoes for one minute- we are chasing time we don't even know where the time goes. If we're not doing things, we're crashing out from doing things. I'm not saying that it's right, I'm just saying that's the way it is. Family commitments and grocery commitments.

My conversation with my dad was a jeckyl and hide thing- certain parts very submissive (when my rational part of the brain kick in) and other part sarcastic and indignant(when the temper and the need to defend self frombeing attacked, kicked in)

My gut reaction is not to talk to him ever again!!! (hahahahahaha!!the spoilt brat). But what I guess we will have to do is to go see them tonight. and eat humble pie. (Eee susahnye) No matter that I think my dad is very quick to see what is lacking and very quick to judge. They are my parents and they deserve better. And they CAN yell at me and Im NOT supposed to merajuk (sebenarnye- eee merajuknye sampai hati you say that I tak sayang you dad. Tak sayang betol betol karang baru tau haa)

Hmmph! You just wait kiddoes. when we turn 60 this will all happen to YOU!!


Waterlily said...

Hi Superwomanwanabe

hmm..this is an interesting subject :) Coz, my mom pun ada jugak bab bab merajuk ni..sampai nangis nangis lagi. But we are so close that we can joke about it later! My dad tak pernah merajuk depan I tapi pernah mengadu dgn my mom. But whatever it is, parents being parents, apa pun, they will forgive us cos they love us as we love them! Thats why, bila time raya, session mintak ampun mintak maaf kat my parents ni lamaaaa sangat. Selalunya, when I sense my parents merajuk, cepat cepat call them up..or pujuk2.

Err..kata orang kan, what we do to our parents will happen to us jugak nanti. Tu yang tak larat dengar, especially nak imagine anak kita menjawab kita balik..huhuhu...

So, good luck SW, by now, your dad dah reda kut dia punya merajuk tu :)

Anonymous said...

kahkahkah...kesian kaklong...

Superwomanwannabe said...

Hi waterlily....

Yeah , we are that close too ...that is why it's hard when they get upset. Anyway I invited them over to dinner and cracked a lot of jokes and basically pretended everything was ok and my dad was okay too. But I take note what they say...cepat terasa kan parents ni.

Thanks for your comment and hope to see you again here soon....!

Anonymous said...


thanks for the wishes dear. In my case, the brains may well come from the dr (hubby's ex is a dr)... that is why I kena carik special school cos I know if my kids inherited anything from me, they'd need special attention to curb their energetic, cheeky and sarcastic selves into ppl like their older siblings hehehehe

Anyway, on the parent situation... the best way to make them understand the things u do, is to update them everyday. I do that. But of course my parents live in the same taman, so they come and visit us instead of the other way around. Disgraceful kan?? ehhehe

Our lives are filled with so much u wonder if its all necessary?? Then u slap urself into reality, it is important, that's why u do it in the first place.

Aida - penat jugak.

Anonymous said...

Hi Shila!

That's the downside of living in KL I guess, nak pergi mana pun take so long so we spend so much time on the road. Memanglah kan, now we are so busy with our own lives and kids. Like me, malas je nak kemana bila weekend.

Orang tua memanglah macam tu, kita pun going in that direction gak. Macam I ni, anak going to Form 1 pun dah emotional habis, tu belum lagi nak kawin tu!

You pujukla parents you minta selalu2 datang rumah you, boleh gak anak2 u lebih bermanja.

Jah (yg dah tak dak parents nor in laws)

MrsNordin said...

This sounds so familiar. Not with my parents, but with my in laws. MrNordin lah selalu kena.

That day, they complained we didn't go and tengok orang repair atap bocor at their house. "Nak buat apa tengok, mak...?", asked MrNordin, as if he got nothing better to do. Then they accused us tak kisah pasal they all. Eh, siapa yang bayar orang repair atap tu? Kita jugak.... Is that what you call tak kisah? Over the weekend baru pegi tengok, itu pun tak kisah?

My take on this, they all saja nak cari issue. So just ignore it, Shila.

aida yurani said...

so, paklong okay dah?

wanshana said...

Parents ni bila dah sampai certain age, memang extra-sensitive, Shila. So, our sensitivity towards their sensitivity pun kena upgrade sket :)

I'm sure it was just a spur of the moment your dad terasa nak blurt out his feelings. Ada lah kot something happened kat rumah ke, around his neighbourhood ke, etc which triggered his emotions. Dah all out tu, dah okay sket kot?

Selamat mengambik hati your parents balik, Shila. All the best :)

Winter Sonata sure is different at 49 years old!

Believe it or not I am rewatching Winter Sonata.. ee geram betul I dengan si Yujin tu lah... she really was a wutz wasn't she? and...