Update on Coming Soon- aka whats the big deal allready lah right aka I have a blog so that I can spare boring everyone in person.

I have taken the plunge today.
I did it!

This morning, I took the scarf I was going to put on for my quran classes, and put it on . Impulsively I told the husband that I was going to try to last the entire day. A whole day with the headscarf on on a nonAdni non tahlil nonreligion day. One step and one day towards forever.

On the way to work we had a heart to heart talk, well, I had a heart to heart talk while he just drove and nodded hehehe. I said , actually are you ok with this. Do you secretly wish that your wife is glamorous (haha as if I was mrsglam before) and he said You are glamorous. (will you shaddap already with this self questioning?? Is what he really thought) and I said if left to me, I think some part of me is not ready ... I want to show my hair and I have so many pearls anyway that I can’t show if I cover up (Yes I am obviously shallow) On the other hand, I never blow my hair or do anything to it that requires anything more fussy than sticking my head outside my car window to dry it. And I can't wear earrings as I have no hole to stick them in, and since clip ons are KGB’s secret torture device I don't wear them either. So it's not like I’d be losing out on this whole beauty regime involving the hair. I don't even own a hairdryer since the last one went kaput.

Ok ok some of you out there will be scratching your head going – eh? This topic AGAIN?? Whats the big deal lah? Nak pakai, pakai lah. Taknak, toksahlah! Seksa diri kenapa? Boringgggg..

(Eh suka hati I lah kan hehehe)

Well, I seksa diri because, (a) I no longer have small toddlers to occupy my attention so I can seksa diri to my heart’s content. And (b) I know it’s something I have to do but I am not ready to do it and (c) I did it before what and managed to do it for eight whole years (and still landed my husband which goes to show that it was neither my looks or brains he went for hahahahahaha!!) and (d) it's my blog. so there.

No one is forcing me. It’s worse if you are the one forcing yourself. You can’t argue with yourself. Well, I can, but I always want to win. (??) I argue with myself, loudly and make my husband participate. In the end I asked what is my problem ni? What is the big fricking deal (says the newly holy me) .

Anyways it's hard to commit the second time around….cause you know how good you can look (wakakakakaakah) with your short skirts – hang on a minute, I never wear short skirts. No sleeveless either, and no short sleeve sangat. And no short pants – all because of my short stumpy body rather than a desire to tutup aurat hehehehe- no lah I am actually very modest and feel shy that's why I don't expose my skin and legs. Could also be the scabs and scars I have.

So having argued with myself and having my husband telling me he REALLY doesn’t mind and would I please stop telling everyone that it's his fault that I'm not covering my head, I pun decided that :

TODAY IS THE DAY

And as of now, the headscarf is still on.

Silap haribulan though because now I'm sitting at Aseana cafĂ© surrounded by glam…and long long blown blond/red hair with sunglasses stuck over head (can I do that with my scarf?) and slinky clothes (me wearing billowy makcik baju kurung) and men not looking my way at ALL. (not that I want them too of course)

Never mind. I shall try to stick with it. Day 1 looking ok. Think of the pahalas....wahahahaha...who shall be having the last laugh you glam gals??? (evil laughter- *sob* so jeles)

Wish me luck!

Comments

Lan0stZz said…
u r totally glam regardless of the tudung kak shila. congrats!!!
yani said…
Hi kak shila,

Do what you think is the best for you..the rest, pedulikan! If you like n feel comfortable wearing the tudung,then by all means, do it and you can definitely spice the new you up! I am confidence you can make wearing the tudung something "in" :)

On the other hand, if you r not ready (like me) then that it is ok too. I think either way, as long as u r happy inside out, you r good.

Whatever you decide to do, i salute you for taking a stand for what you believe.
lana...you are soo sweet hehehe adn thanks!
yani, thanks for the kind words. I cant wait for me to be ready lah, so I will just put it on and hope I will suddenly BE ready heheheh. God is great anything can happen...!
natasha said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Dad of 4+1 said…
SW - What's with Natasha?? Very oxymoronic huh
anedra said…
Go girl go!!!!!!!! (Mexican wave and all!!)
bella said…
all the best!
yus said…
Go Shila Go!! you can do it!

biasalah..bila nak buat benda baik ni memang byk dugaannya..those funny voices keep telling you to do the opposites..hang in there..insyallah..

betul..we always said we're not ready etc but how long r we gonna wait until we r ready??...one step at a time..;O)
wanshana said…
Shila,

If you feel today is the day, then, today is the day, then :) YOU decide, okay?

Very happy for you. Congrats!

All the best, dear.
I hope you will like the scarf I'm giving you :) said…
Alhamdulillah :)
MAMAMIA said…
Alhamdulillah....

Don't worry Shila, U can still be fashionable & glamourous. Sekarang macam2 Islamic / Muslimah fashion ada. Tudung pun macam2 gaya ada ie Munawwarah, Hajaba, Ratu, tudung Ekin etc, etc.

Another reason to go shopping spree!!! Tapi, U tak suka shopping kan???
MrsNordin said…
At last...!

You've always wanted to wear it for as long as I can remember, but always unsure. Now that you've decided, I'm happy for you.

Eh, pakai tudung pun still cantik, what... Now, you've put me under pressure !!
jabishah said…
Alhamdulillah...

I know it is a big step. But again it is all up to you. All the best.
DocYana said…
I totally get what you were writing! I do that, and inadvertantly torture husband in the process, though not necessarily in the issue of hijab.

Nevertheless, the bottom line is, as long as you are sure of who you are and what you stand for, and being a decent person at the end of the day, I reckon, so what with what other people may think....
natasha- er...okkk totally spammish

dadoffourplus 2 more- tu yang you nampak dalam banyak nye comment? hehehehehehe

anendra- thanks sayang!!!!!

bella- thanks v much, bells...hope berkekalan ke anak cucu..hehehehe
Yus- yaaa dah lah decide dah , i pun naik penat talk to myself...hehehehe

Shana.Thanks dear for your kind words...So far so good. It is not that hard after all...orang tua kalau nak berubah susah...

BJ- that voice tu is totally yours in my head(the one that says "what is the big deal?? nak pakai pakai taknak TOKSAH!) hehehe- you do what your heart tells you ok....
Mamamia- never mind I will check the storess out...allready got some leads- jalan tar (yuckss) , ampang park (alahai jauh) and also klcc (mahal)

ah-ah lah i malas shopping heheheheh
Jabishah- thanks v much....

Doc Yana- you drive your husband crazy too??? I kesian kat dia as this has been going on for several months hahahhaha
MRSHUSiN said…
congrats kak Long!
my turn next! tapi tatau bila...
inshaAllah.... =)
Madam Tai Tai said…
Hi SW,

It that is what you want, good! I support you totally.

Can't wait to see you this June with your new look! ;-) Btw, sapa kata kalau dah pakai tudung, tak boleh pakai pearls???
kay_leeda said…
SW,

Relax babe...one step at a time. Everything will just fall into place naturally. Most importantly IT must come from within you. Deliberate and ponder upon it, no worries :)

InshaAllah...and all the best.
ms hart said…
This is SOOOO Superwomanwannabe - benda ala=ala serious pun boleh jadi ala-ala 'comedy thriller' (?!!) gitu!!!! woahahaa...I laughed through your 'monologue-tak-monologue' ni, tau! Whatever it is, it's the heart that matters, dear. Ikhlas, that's the whole point, ok? And that MrsN's voice - nak pakai ke tak nak? Tak nak pakai, toksah!' - adoiiii...sakit jaw i tergelak lah!!!
aida yurani said…
kak long..... seriously serious? Wow, I can't wait to see your dad when he knows about this. Good luck, one step at a time. You can still pakai baju glamer you with tudung. nanti lama2 dah biasa, dah pandai adjust and match, ok lah.

I'm feeling happy about this.

ps: with or without tudung, you lawa, glamour, cantek, dan sewaktu dengannya. :)
Izan- ya ke? u want to? I think ..JUST DO IT. heheh
Madam tai tai- can ah? Must go get the extenders lah kan?
Kayleeda- ya..akhirnya it comes from you...memang kena pressure, but by self.
MrsHart= isnt that her voice??? ehehehehe...

Aida- thanks..wish me luck...glamer ke tak im allready 40..my dad sure suka if he knows!
LifeBloom said…
Shila - I was so terhibur dengan your recantation of your inner voices - partly because I had those moments too!

Alhamdullilah - you tau kan you glam and beautiful with or without tudung right? Its in the attitude and how you carry yourself.

Memang there are so many "bisikan" on the way to goodness - thats the job of "you - know -who/what". Its our calling to quash those bisikans and do what pleases Allah SWT.

You'll do great girl!

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