Guide to Parenting (not)

You know, someone should organise a diploma programme for parenting. At the very least , masa nak kawin, in addition to the kawincourse , you must go for a parenting course. There's a range of skills I think we all need from certificate to phD. Kalau for myself this is what I need:

1. Basic Certificate in Parenting- 0 - 3 years old.

This will cover basics such as how to put on diapers, how to give the baby a bath, how to tell if the baby is crying because he's hungry or he's just bored . Also mothers will learn how to sleep with one eye open. You will also be taught how to stare down a 2 year old, how to control your temper around toddlers and how to remember that THEY are the toddler and not you. Fathers will learn how to get their own coffee from now. And why it is right to take over mother's duties as soon as they come back from work and let her go for that bubble bath.

2. Diploma- 4-7 years old.

Here you will learn how to deal with anxiety issues or separation issues. (can be the child's or the mom's). What to teach your kids,. What to feed your kids, what to let him watch on telly. Playschool and pros and cons. Prayers and doas and how everything comes from the Almighty Allah . How to potty train. How to cope with the first day of school. Course on : Is RM1.00 enough for pocket money?

3.Degree- 8-12 years old.

Further course on anxiety issues (should you let your child go to his friend's house for a sleepover ). You will learn where all the erasers and rulers that you bought go. You will learn how to organise birthday party at a drop of a hat. You will also learn that if you do not check their books they may not be doing their homework.

4. Masters merangkap PhD

Well it will take a MAsters Degree AND a PhD to cover what comes after 12 don't you think!!!! How to handle sulking teenagers, how to say NO to your kids' request to lepaks , how to say NO to your kids request NOT to come with you to kenduris and family events... how how how ...and above all, how to be a friend AND a parent and how to tell when you need to be what to them..How to be sabar and how to be strict and how to be fun. How to be disciplinarian and how to let go.

What do you think? Dapat sambutan tak??




Comments

Anonymous said…
pasti ada sambutan but short courses will do la. if till phd...susah sikit. by the time we belajar habis, anak pula yg dah masuk U and dapat PhD :)

Regards,
Sally
MrsNordin said…
Definitely!! We can call it "How to be a Parent?"

Actually, right now, we all learn 'on the job'. That's why some fail and some succeed. Pening!

But you know what? I think, once you complete this PhD program, you probably don't want to have any children!! Ha! Ha!
AzeedA said…
assalamualaikom kak shila.. :)

sgt3 agree with u!
make it as compulsory as kursus kahwin.. jgn tau nk branak je kan.. e eh emo pulak.. ;)
Hey Sally..hmm macam mana ye?? maybe crash course ???
Mrs Nordin!! YOu are right!! Terus serik!! Having a child is something you have to do without overthinking it!!
Azeeda...haa betul tu.. nanti tak pandai menangani anak susah kan??

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